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Maine Lemonade Christmas lorry begins tour of USA

Maine Lemonade Christmas lorry begins tour of USA

US Politicians set aside their differences today to welcome news that the famous Maine Lemonade Christmas lorry had finally arrived in their divided country. “Your Maine Lemonade is part of the fabric of an American Christmas,” outgoing President Barack Obama told The Ulster Fry. “The founding fathers of our great nation drank it on the

russianmuff

Russian warships now refuelling at Muff Filling Station

Following NATO intervention to block Russian warships from refuelling in Spain earlier today, The Ulster Fry has learned that the fleet were then diverted to the Derry/Donegal border to fill up at the world famous Top Muff Filling Station. “Vladimir Putin is a cunning and ruthless operator” said CIA analyst, Zach Crakensachs. “Our intel suggests he ordered his fleet captains to ‘fill em to

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Donald Trump vows to build wall around Lisburn

US Presidential hopeful Donald Trump has stirred further controversy by telling a packed audience in New York that he’d build a wall around the Northern Ireland town of Lisburn. “We will build a wall around Lisburn, and we will make Lisburn pay for it,” he promised the crowd. “For too long these people have been

ballakini

‘Balakinis’ to be issued on Northern Irish beaches

Following the news that French authorities are forcing Burkini wearing women to strip off – local councils in Northern Ireland have also released guidelines for how people should dress on their beaches. However the authorities here are turning the French plan on its head and demanding that all visitors cover up as much as possible by

castaway

How to survive Brexit – an Ulster Fry Guide

There’s turmoil in the financial markets, politicians are resigning left, right and centre, and no one seems to know whether we’re in, out or kinda half way out with our mammy saying you can’t go without a coat. However there are things we can all do to lessen the impact of the crisis – here’s

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