A County Antrim petrol station owner is said to be "delighted with himself" after erecting the most ridiculously over-sized milk advert ever seen on the planet. 54-year-old Uel Tanker told The Ulster Fry that the ploy would put his station...
French car companies have finally woken up to the fact that many people here struggle to pronounce their names, and are to undergo complete rebrands to suit the Northern Irish consumer. According to Parisian motoring journalist Sylvestre Lecat, the change...
After decades of taunting from people who angrily quit work, one local boss has finally made good on an age-old parting suggestion and literally stuck his job up his arse. "It started like any other shift" explained Chuck McNugget from Belfast Fried Chicken. "Kayleigh was on the tills...
Amid rumours that the next Star Wars film will be partly filmed on the dank, inhospitable planet of Lisburn, the Northern Ireland economy received a further boost after it was revealed that Harland and Wolff shipyard will build the...
The value of shares in County Tyrone has plummeted after two days of frantic trading on Wall Street. The crisis began yesterday on the New York Sticks Exchange, where all things culchie are traditionally traded. The turf price was the first...
The people of Northern Ireland will soon be spending 'Yokes' after the Stormont administration moved with unusual speed to calm fears over the dramatic fall in the value of the pound. "It's pretty clear the pound is f**ked," said First...
In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out the window. The new system has already been trialled on a select number of Ryanair's Boeing 737...
Millions of people took selfies of themselves looking 'delighted' today after Facebook announced that their newsfeed system would be changing to show more stories about everyone's new favourite topic - themselves. "Our users have complained that our current newsfeed shows too much stuff that they're not interested in" said Mark Zuckerberg...
The directors of Belfast International Airport have hit on an audacious plan to upstage their City rivals by re-launching under an exciting new brand. "It's a difficult market out there," said Head of Marketing Andrew Crampon, "so we need...
People who communicate entirely through selfies were distraught today, after news emerged that photo app SnapChat had removed their ‘Top 3’ feature – meaning they could no longer creep on people to see which other people they were creeping...

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Ryanair begin charging customers to look out the window

In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out...