There were wild Celebrations in a Belfast accountancy firm today after local clerk Robert Basset opened his lunch to reveal a sandwich filled with Quality Street chocolates. "I was gonna dump the pile of leftover junk food so we could...
Men can't wait to open their 'surprise' Christmas presents it has been revealed - as stocks of stuff other people left at their arse in the bathroom run dangerously low across the country. "I've been fixing my hair with with the wife's mousse since Halloween" admitted Newry builder, Jim Trowel....
With families still finding it tough to make ends meet financially, a recent survey has revealed that doing a wash has become so ridiculously expensive that many mums are now forced to buy new clothes from Primark instead. "Have you seen the...
Nearly 100 people have been hospitalised in Belfast due to injuries caused by massive golf umbrellas in the past two days, The Ulster Fry has learned. With injuries ranging from minor cuts right through to fully poked out eyes, the...
With temperatures hitting 'baltic' in recent days, local shoppers have begun their annual winter ritual of purchasing brand new hats, scarves and gloves to leave at their arse somewhere within the next fortnight, the Ulster Fry has learned. "It would...
A driver who was kindly ‘flashed’ by an another road user at a junction to allow them to join traffic is set to take their f**king time about it, the Ulster Fry has learned. “I like to ponder the meaning...
In the latest instalment of our in-depth guides to all things Northern Ireland, we tell you 8 fascinating facts you never knew about County Tyrone. 1. Tyrone is the only Northern Irish county visible from space. That's right, it's the biggest of the six...
A top French chef has opened a fashionable new Parisian restaurant that only serves delicacies traditionally found in a Northern Irish petrol station. 43-year-old Marco Peure Shite told us that he came up with idea while holidaying here last summer. "Oui,"...
Local fathers were united in their praise of their offspring today, after children across the country turned up at the family home this morning with a piece of cardboard inside an envelope. "I felt like I was announcing the Oscars" revealed 57 year old father...
Driving in Northern Ireland is a whole handlin'. Apart from learning all that stuff in the Highway Code, there's a heap of unwritten rules to follow. We've compiled a handy list so you know the craic! 1:  Only overtake other cars on blind bends NI...

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Ryanair begin charging customers to look out the window

In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out...