Following the launch of a video generator to remind everyone how great 2016 was, Facebook today admitted that most users are avoiding it because they 'aren't clean buck mental'. "With hindsight this was a terrible idea" admitted Facebook manager, Sharon Lyke. "Between Brexit and Trump, the deaths...
The people of America have woken up with a wild hangover and a bad smell in their hallway after inadvertently getting blocked for 18 months. Across the nation families were carefully opening little plastic containers and bags which they found...
Citizens of earth went clean buck mental today, after world renowned website, The Ulster Fry, announced that today was the first birthday of world renowned website, The Ulster Fry. Dignitaries the world over congratulated the website for reaching the historic milestone with messages of...
There are growing fears in United Nations circles that County Fermanagh may have become the latest superpower to join the exclusive club of 'nuclear weapon states.' The concerns arose following the arrest of Ballinamallard man Bernard Ford at a checkpoint...
Following yesterday's tragic shooting in Virginia in which two journalists were brutally gunned down by a crazed ex-colleague, the United States congress has finally bowed to pressure to rewrite the country's gun laws. "We've reviewed the evidence and taken everyones...
An exhaustive investigation by The Ulster Fry Insight Team has uncovered convincing evidence that "High Street" Christmas Clubs are secretly recruiting members for terrorist groups across the globe. The clubs, supposedly designed to allow families to save for Christmas, have...
The Secretary-General of the United Nations Ban Ki-Moon has raised fears that the world will soon run out of plastic, because you have most of it in your kitchen. "Our inspectors have been secretly examining the homes of people in...
Within minutes of last night's controversial Westminster vote to commence bombing Syria, local members of the Regional Arguments Force quickly scrambled to their sofas to launch strategic strikes on their perceived opponents - despite understanding very little about what...
Ordinary police officers who follow orders and conduct investigations in a thorough and methodical manner are more effective than their maverick counterparts, a Department of Justice report has claimed. "For years cinema and television have portrayed successful law enforcement officers...
As British media outlets keep the nation safe by reporting immigration problems like  terrorist attacks, the UK government has taken swift action to avoid further foreign invasion, by hiring a team of immigration specialists from abroad. "Our country is at breaking point!"...

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Ryanair begin charging customers to look out the window

In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out...