Ireland’s national day of getting pissed and singing songs they only half know the words to was thrown into crisis this morning, after historians pointed out that St Patrick was in fact a Brit. “Ah f**k, I think they actually...
The sad passing of George Michael yesterday, combined with the loss of Status Quo's Rick Parfitt on Christmas Eve, has forced the authorities to issue an immediate 'cotton wool wrapping' of all remaining well loved celebrities. "We're facing a national...
With Gareth currently causing property damage and travel chaos across the country, his mum has told the Ulster Fry that he's grounded when he gets home. "He was always such a good boy, I don't where I went wrong!" a...
A County Armagh man has has travelled to the USA to make a unique offer to the people of that troubled country - to personally knock the smug look off Donald Trump's fat face. 48 year old Declan Flannery arrived...
There are growing fears that the crisis in the Ukraine may have spread to Northern Ireland after Russian troops began mobilising on the Carrickfergus/Larne border. There have been several sightings of military jets close to Larne airspace, and gunboats...
Following news that four new episodes of Game of Thrones were leaked online, allegations have now emerged that the Northern Irish extras used on the show are at the centre of the piracy scandal. It is believed HBO's investigators made...
Within minutes of last night's controversial Westminster vote to commence bombing Syria, local members of the Regional Arguments Force quickly scrambled to their sofas to launch strategic strikes on their perceived opponents - despite understanding very little about what...
A Belfast civil servant has become the first person in Europe to be executed under the EU's stringent new General Data Protection Regulations (GDPR). It is understood that 28-year-old Mal Ware left his desk at the Department of the Agriculture,...
The planet watched in wonder today as one of the internet’s greatest natural phenomena – the solar eclipse – spread across the screens of smart-phones, tablets and laptops everywhere. Millions of social media users gazed at the event from the safety...
The world of Information Technology was plunged into mourning today after the untimely death of one of its greatest figures. According to his family Brian Sturgeon, also know as Brain Surgeon, died at 6am this morning "after a shirt I'll...

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Ryanair begin charging customers to look out the window

In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out...