The boundary of the world famous Grand Canyon has been dramatically expanded to include Northern Ireland, after a US delegation visited and seen our impressive pothole network first-hand.
“God dang, I really felt right at home!” exclaimed Dout Pitt from the Arizona Tourist Board. “We’ve been looking for ways to take the Grand Canyon global, and when I seen the absolute state of thon roads, I knew we were onto a winner!”
US authorities have moved quickly to strike a deal with the Department for Infrastructure, which will see almost £0m ploughed into fixing and maintaining NI roads over the next few years.
“We’ve bought a new fleet of helicopters to take tourists to some of the most impressive road craters around the country instead” explained NI Tourism chief, Phil McCracken. “Derry, Tyrone and Armagh are nearly sold out, but there are still of seats left for Antrim and Fermanagh”
“This is gonna be a much needed boost to our declining tourism industry after they ballsed up the ending to Game Of Thrones” he added.
The plan has come under criticism though, with some questioning how it would be funded during the current economic decline. However a DFI spokesman assured us that money wouldn’t be a problem.
“Our rich American backers are savvy business people. They know how to monetise services and maximise profits” explained Pat Tyre from the Road Service.
“So we’ll be putting up your road tax to pay for it all immediately”