Feuding Oasis brothers Liam and Noel Gallagher are so determined to continue their long-running disagreement that they have moved to Belfast and joined different sides of the political divide, the Ulster Fry has learned. “Noel has just bought a house in the Shankill Estate” revealed estate agent, Norton Pinprick “He’s also applied to join the Orange Order and pledged up…
EXCLUSIVE: Fast & Furious 9 to be filmed in Northern Ireland
With their eighth globetrotting instalment currently breaking box office records, Vin Diesel has confirmed that the next Fast & Furious movie will be shot in Northern Ireland. “Toretto’s crew is going back-to-basics!” revealed Diesel. “Their cash is running out, so they’ll be relying on their wits, instincts and ability to spot a clinker at the mid-Ulster auctions to get back on the road!” His co-star Michelle Rodriguez…
Morgan Freeman’s God to sort out NI’s Easter opening hours
Hollywood legend Morgan Freeman, currently filming in Belfast, has sensationally reprised his role as God after discovering that he will won’t be able to skull a few pints tomorrow night after work. “Dafaq lik?” he moaned to crew after learning of the archaic NI Easter licensing laws. “Are yousuns tikkin the han’ outta me or wha?”…
Nine surprising cameos in the Paisley & McGuinness movie
Following the release of the official trailer for The Journey, which tells of the unlikely friendship between Ian Paisley and Martin McGuinness, The Ulster Fry has had an exclusive sneak-peak at the film, in which several famous Hollywood movie stars have made secret cameo appearances. We look at some of the best… Owen Wilson & Vince Vaughn as…
Cash strapped NI celebs working second jobs to make ends meet
Many local celebrities have been forced to take part-time jobs to finance their lavish lifestyles, the Ulster Fry has learned. “With Nolan and Mitchell’s ridiculous wage demands, the rest of us are barely scraping by!” moaned TV presenter Marc Mallet as he picked us up in an Uber with an uncanny resemblance to a UTV news van. The news was confirmed by…
Beyonce ‘absolutely raging’ with George Clooney, admits pal Barra Best
Pop-star Beyonce, who recently got news at the Ulster Hospital that she had two buns in the oven, is reportedly ‘pure snapping’ at George Clooney and his wife Amal for ‘blatantly copying’ them, according to Jay Zed’s best mucker, BBCNI weatherman, Barra Best. Clooney, who lives with his glamorous wife in a semi-detached in Doagh,…
10 random memes that the internet made for us
OK, we’re bored with heating scandals, and a bit hungover, so can’t really be arsed doing a proper post. However we found a handy wee yoke on the interweb that lets you put in a photo into Facebook Messenger, and it turns it into a meme with random text. We’ve had a hoke through our…
David Attenborough to film ‘Blue Bag Planet’ documentary in Norn Iron
Following the success of Planet Earth II, naturalist David Attenborough has decided to update his Blue Planet series by visiting one of the most inhospitable places on earth – Northern Ireland. Billed as the television event of the year, Blue Bag Planet will follow an indigenous species known as the Funnel Drinking Spide as it crosses treacherous…
Another rake of Norn Iron Ladybird Books.
OK, so we thought we’d make one more set of these, sure they’re good craic. One about Bangor One about politicians One about Riverdance And one about marching One about South Armagh One about hobbies One about scary folk One about blowing stuff up One about the traffic updates on Radio Ulster One about practical…
Kanye West quits tour “to try Northern Irish politics”
Controversial rapper Kanye West has shocked fans and critics alike by cancelling the US leg of his Saint Pablo tour, in order to make a shock move into politics in Northern Ireland. The gigs were cancelled after the star treated audience members at one show to a 20-minute rant in which he slagged everyone from Beyonce…