Ever wonder how the two main parties here know how to react in a crisis? They simply rush to one of Stormont’s Accusation Stations™ and select one of their default settings.
As the controversy over possible Provo involvement in the murder of a Short Strand man continues to grow, Sinn Fein currently have their Denial Dial set to ‘Not Us’, whilst occasionally flicking to one of the other settings to try to confuse the media.
Meanwhile the DUP’s Blame Gauge is set firmly to ‘Sinn Fein’. The chances are they’ll set it to ‘The Alliance’ at some point, although former Health Minister Jim Wells is frantically trying to persuade his party to select ‘The Gays’.
Keep your copy of the Accusation Station™ close to hand and you’ll be better able to understand the various crises that seem to strike Stormont from time to time. From Welfare Reform to Parades to Flags, the Accusation Station™ is always ready to wheel out an excuse.
This post has been brought to you by the Ulster Fry Educational Foundation. Please do not swear.