Ulster Fry to be written in Irish and Ulster Scots under new Stormont deal

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With the Assembly back up and running again, the writers of the Ulster Fry have been shocked to learn that they must now translate their website into Irish and Ulster Scots.

Agus an Tionól ag teacht ar ais arís, tá ionadh ar scríbhneoirí an Ulster Fry go gcaithfidh siad a suíomh idirlín a aistriú go Gaeilge agus Prod.

With tha Semmlie beck up an’ runnin agin, the scrievers o’ the Ulster Fry hiv bin shacked tae larn thit they mus noo change the wurds o’ thair wabsite intil themuns spake an’ the hamely tongue.

Sadly, Seamus can’t remember any of the Irish he learned in school, so they are forced to rely on Google translate. Billy, however, was taught Ulster Scots by his granny so is completely fluent in the language.

Faraor, ní féidir le Seamus cuimhneamh ar aon cheann de na Gaeilge a d’fhoghlaim sé ar scoil, mar sin ní mór dóibh a bheith ag brath ar Google translate. Mhúin a mhaimeo Prod do Liam, áfach, mar sin tá sé go hiomlán líofa sa teanga.

Sadlie, James cannae mind oany o’ tha themuns spake he larnt in scule, so they hiv to put up wi’ Gugle wurd changer. William, howiver, was taucht the hamely tongue by his Graunie, so is fair gabbie in the langwidge.

However, after giving the matter a lot of thought, and writing three paragraphs, Billy has decided that he cannot be arsed and will carry on as before, even if they do get a fine from the new commissioners.

Mar sin féin, tar éis go leor machnaimh a dhéanamh ar an ábhar, agus trí mhír a scríobh, tá cinneadh déanta ag Liam nach féidir é a chur ina luí agus leanfaidh sé ar aghaidh mar a bhí roimhe, fiú má fhaigheann siad fíneáil ó na coimisinéirí nua.

Howiver, Efter givin’ the metter a lock o’ thocht, an’ scrievin thrie verses, Billy his determit thit he cannae be ersed an’ will gay oan as o’ yore, e’en they dae git a tellin’ aff frae the new high heid yins.

“Feck this for a game of soldiers,” added Seamus

“”Cuir seo i gcomhair cluiche saighdiúirí,” chuir Seamus leis

“Buck thon fur a gemm o’ Kilties,” added James.