With temperatures plummeting to baltic and the price of everything on the rise, including oil, fuel, gas, food, electric, broadband, taxis, paint, washing powder, chocolate, daddo rail, cheese, ice cream and even the stuff in the middle aisle of Lidl – one romantic local man has spared no expense this Valentines Day by splashing out on a luxurious 500 litres of home heating oil.
I was originally gonna take her to the Galgorm for a few daysâ explained 31 year old, Derry man Phil Adrum. âShe was dropping hints for weeks about getting me alone for some hot and steamy action, but then I thought to meself, haul on. If I stick the thermostat up full whack, get the radiators piping and hang a lock of wet towels on em, sure weâd be able to kill two birds with one stone!â
âAnd right enough she was well pleasedâ he told us.
The couple broadcast their âbig romantic momentâ on Instagram Live this morning as local company Hutcheon Fuels delivered the touching romantic gesture in a special racy-red fuel truck, much to the annoyance of other men, who had stupidly spend a fortune on flowers, chocolate, teddy bears and dinner reservations.
âWish Iâd thought of that myselfâ admitted 37 year old, Max Olgarage. âI have a table for two booked for later, but I might nip out here and get her a drum of oil or two here, just to take the bad look off meself”
However other local men were similarly on the ball this Valentineâs whilst looking for some hot stuff this evening.
âMy missus spent a fortune on sexy underwear as a wee Valentineâs treat for me!â revealed an excited Dan Summers. âSo I thought the least I could do was stick ÂŁ50 on the gas card, so we can stay nice and toasty into the wee small hoursâ he winked. “If ye know what I mean”
âNaw, itâll not even last that longâ his missus told us later.