‘Wagon wheel’ accused “a victim of the justice system”, says UN

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The Coleraine man at the centre of the “Nathan Carter” trial has been described as “the victim of a gross miscarriage of justice” by top legal experts at the United Nations.

The solicitor for 53 year old man had told the court that his client had cracked under pressure after a neighbour repeatedly played the song Wagon Wheel on his stereo. Sadly this drove the defendent to take the law into his own hands, and he received a fine and suspended sentence.

“Any f**king wonder he flipped,” was the bemused reaction of UN legal expert Sammy Chakrabarti. “Hearing that song once is more than enough, but repeated playing almost certainly contravenes Human Rights Legislation.”

“The use of ‘cruel and unusual punishments’ is banned under international law, and this certainly falls into that category.”

The miscarriage of justice has touched the hearts of thousands of people including Holywood star George Clooney, whose wife is a prominent Human Right lawyer.

“When I heard the news my first thought was ‘what the actual f**k is going on here?’,” he told us. “I assumed your judge would give the guy some kind of medal then order that yer man’s stereo was confiscated, and then this happens? It’s insane.”

Mr Clooney has gathered together several famous friends including Alex Baldwin, Susan Sarandon and Sean Penn to launch a campaign for “Wagon Wheel Wan”, and plans are afoot for a movie about the trial.

Starring Brad Pitt, the tense courtroom drama The People versus Nathan Carter is likely to hit cinemas in January 2017.

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