Business

In a shock development unrelated to anything in the news, it has emerged that the DUP has plans to launch its own travel agency. "Club 16-90 will offer attractive holidays whatever your budget, so long as that budget is absolutely humongous...

Government plans to test driverless lorries on the UK's roads will ensure that their computer systems are able to replicate the behaviour of actual lorry drivers, The Ulster Fry has learned. "These new lorries will be able to do everything that a manned...

A staggering 112% of beards here are now working in a Game of Thrones related industry, new figures from the Department of Unusual Statistics have revealed. "Prior to Game of Thrones there was huge unemployment in the facial hair community,"...

Amid news that an increase in arrests for drunken behaviour by passengers may lead to curbs on the sale of alcohol on flights, a Belfast based airline has launched a service aimed exclusively at plastered travellers. Queasy Jet will operate...

Amidst the news that over 2,500 UK products have gotten smaller in a phenomenon called 'shrinkflation', local crisp magnate Tayto has reassured customers that their packets haven't shrunk - they're just further away. "Your arms are at least 6 inches longer now than...

The technology sector West of the Bann is set to get a major boost as part of the negotiations between the DUP and the Conservative Party in London, which will see £150 million paid out to provide ultra-fast broadband...

The world of male grooming was turned on it’s head today, as one Belfast barber shop unveiled an audacious plan to simply cut men’s hair without trying to pretend they are prize fighters, 1920’s dockers, lumberjacks or vikings. Nick's Barbers on Queen...

The Head Spokesminter of the Royal Mint announced today that the newly-launched £1 coin, much lauded for its improvements in security, would not be legal tender in Northern Ireland until an Executive is formed. "The launch of the new coin was a...

Cultural commentators across the globe have agreed that Western Civilisation can advance no further after an off licence in Lurgan unveiled the Buckfast Easter Egg. "Writers, artists, inventors and scientists can just give up now," said that BBC culture expert...

French car companies have finally woken up to the fact that many people here struggle to pronounce their names, and are to undergo complete rebrands to suit the Northern Irish consumer. According to Parisian motoring journalist Sylvestre Lecat, the change...