Northern Ireland is well on the way to becoming the world's largest pothole, a major international conference was told today. Addressing the World Holeiologist Society, Professor Gar MacAdam told his fellow experts that a lack of roads investment "combined with...
There was anger in North Belfast this morning after it was revealed that former Take That singer Jason Orange is planning to invest over £15 million of his fortune in a new housing development in the Ardoyne area. Mr Orange,...
The PSNI has a new weapon in its armoury this summer - specially designed trailers that will see rioters placed on the naughty step until they promise to behave themselves. Costing almost £100,000 each, the trailers will be placed in...
Members of a DUP LGBT faction are planning to take part in this weekend's Pride parade, while at the same time protesting at their own involvement. "As proud members of the LGBT community, we're very much looking forward to the...
A Belfast man is in intensive care after being subjected to repeated Baby Shark attacks whilst surfing the web with his kids. Traumatised Glengormley father, Martin Brody, told us he can't get the harrowing six hour ordeal out of his...
A new study conducted by an international team of scientists has concluded that the annual Northern Irish ritual of setting fire to things is mainly enjoyed by arseholes. "It's clear that piling up huge pyres of pallets and bedecking them...
Northern Ireland is suffering from a plague of molluscs after local politicians inadvertently issued press releases appealing for clams over the marching season. It is understood that their request was relayed to God, who took it at face value and added...
Businesses and celebrities have come together to support a new charity which hopes to alleviate the plight of Gingers struggling to cope with the hot weather. Speaking at the launch of ''Ginger Aid", celebrity supporter Barra Best told an invited...
"I was pretty sure he was one of us," was the most common reaction in Ballymena this evening after a man described locally as a "blow in" was observed mowing his front lawn on the Lord's Day. It is understood that 34-year-old...
There were chaotic scenes outside Debenham's this afternoon as an angry mob gathered to protest against having to buy a load of expensive shite for Gay friends who get married. Four people were arrested after they attempted to gain entry...

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Ryanair begin charging customers to look out the window

In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out...