The PSNI has made a swift move to clamp down on so-called "Killer Clowns" here, by hiring well-known superhero Batman to deal with the dicks behind it. The craze, which began in America of course, involves arseholes dressing up as...
Two alleged criminals from East Belfast were forced to leave their homes today after police officers knocked on their doors and intimidated them with the law, the Ulster Fry understands. "They just rocked up and told they had to leave!" revealed nosey neighbour,...
A boy from Comber is now permanently disfigured after failing to listen to his mother's warnings about the dangers of making faces in windy conditions. 12-year-old Billy Nutsack was pulling faces at his younger brother during a family outing to...
There was widespread panic across Northern Ireland last night, as Mother Nature unleashed what journalists have described as a "Massive Snow Explosion" . The extent of the weather chaos was matched only by the wildness of the celebrations in...
Cats across Northern Ireland have promised to put aside their differences and do some vaguely useful work during the Coronavirus lockdown. With dog movement limited to walks with their owners, cats are now...
A new school founded on the principles and teachings of Country music is set to open in Dungannon, Education Minister Peter Weir has revealed. Mr. Weir told the Ulster Fry that families in Tyrone have long campaigned for a school...
Following the news that many retired paramilitaries have fully embraced democracy and are using their influence to line their pockets, a new paramilitary organisation has been setup to tackle the criminal activity of old paramilitary organisations. "We've had enough of...
Following the removal of sexy promotional girls from high profile events including Formula 1, darts and road racing, the Northern Ireland Parades Commission have announced they're banning provocatively dressed ladies from all future parades. "For too long now crowds at...
The people of Larne are celebrating this evening after a 54 year old local man set a new world record for the most impressive indoor fireworks display ever created. 44 year old Rowland Candle told us that he decided to...
There is embarrassment in Belfast City Hall today after it was revealed that a simple clerical error had scuppered plans for the biggest tourist event of the year - the Tall Ships race. "Aye instead of booking a host of...

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Ryanair begin charging customers to look out the window

In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out...