Business

After yet more travel chaos at Aldergrove, Belfast International Airport have unveiled a new range of 'package queuing holidays'. "The pain in the hole of getting through our airport has gone from strength-to-strength down the years." explained security manager, Annie...

Northern Irish drinkers were left furious after reports emerged that one of Belfast's most treasured places to not swing a cat is being sent home because it's a foreigner. "Si senor, they have told us to pack up our sheet...

After another security hoax went viral on social media, Facebook have finally admitted the vast majority of their users will believe any oul shite. "Nearly 15 years on, and most still haven't figured on no-one ever wins those free iPads, Thompson...

A Co Antrim businessman has launched an X-rated website aimed squarely at Northern Irish Protestants. Ballymena entrepreneur Bertie Oldman told The Ulster Fry that he believed that he'd spotted a gap in the market. "The World Wide Interwab is full of...

Scientists across the globe are hailing a 'major breakthrough in human development' after a Co. Antrim housewife became the first ever woman to work out how to put a toilet seat down. 42-year-old Wanda Pish made the discovery when she...

A new takeaway opened by two Turkish businessmen has been forced to close after being inundated with creeps and perverts. "Plenty Of Fish" in West Belfast, which offers a huge selection of battered seafood dishes, told us they were 'horrified'...

Following the news that Coca Cola have bought coffee chain Costa for £3.9bn, the Ulster Fry can exclusively reveal that Northern Irish soft drinks giant, Maine, have purchased rival coffee brand, Starbucks. "This will be an absolute game changer for...

Following the revelation that global election results are being coerced by nefarious social media activity, local tech startup Jordanstown Analytica have admitted they've been manipulating NI voters on Facebook too. "Our practices aren't as sophisticated as them Cambridge smartholes," admitted...

A new restaurant is aiming to give a trendy makeover to that staple of the Northern Irish dinner table - the humble crisp sandwich. Inspired by the 'Cereal Cafe' recently opened in London by two Belfast brothers, restaurateur Gavin Spleen hopes...

Supermarket giant Sainsbury's has been forced to cancel its planned massive baby sale as it has unable to source enough over-sized infants. "Massive baby sales have become increasingly popular across the retail sector," said Tommy Tippee, Sainsbury's Head of Ridiculous...