Businesses and celebrities have come together to support a new charity which hopes to alleviate the plight of Gingers struggling to cope with the hot weather. Speaking at the launch of ''Ginger Aid", celebrity supporter Barra Best told an invited...
A 48 year old County Tyrone farmer has set a new world record for the fastest ever complaint about a spell of good weather. The Ulster Fry has learned that Donemana man Marty Ferguson made the remark to a local shopkeeper...
The Education Authority has announced radical plans to deal with underachievement among working class Protestant boys here, including the addition of Bonfire Construction to the GCSE syllabus. Revealing the move, Chief Examiner Hugh Grade told reporters it would address a...
The whereabouts of dozens of tourists visiting Northern Ireland remains unknown at present, after 'rival gangs' operating in Belfast City Centre were seen forcing sightseers off the streets and into nearby vehicles earlier today. The situation began early this morning near Royal Avenue, after men in brightly-coloured jackets were...
"I was pretty sure he was one of us," was the most common reaction in Ballymena this evening after a man described locally as a "blow in" was observed mowing his front lawn on the Lord's Day. It is understood that 34-year-old...
Following the news that many retired paramilitaries have fully embraced democracy and are using their influence to line their pockets, a new paramilitary organisation has been setup to tackle the criminal activity of old paramilitary organisations. "We've had enough of...
A bizarre error has seen the son of God mistakenly make his Easter return to a small Co Antrim village, the Ulster Fry has learned. The mishap occurred after Gideons made an unholy typo in their latest Bible, which now...
Northern Ireland's unemployment problems were sensationally solved overnight after everyone in the country became a fully qualified legal expert, the Ulster Fry has learned. "I can't really explain it" explained 28 year old, Alan McBeal, a newly qualified solicitor who...
Community relations in Northern Ireland have been given a much needed shot in the arm with a plan to twin towns across the community divide. The scheme is the brainchild of top academic Professor Colin Glen, who argues that there's...
Belfast has beaten off stiff competition from Mexico City, Beijing and Strabane to scoop top spot in a United Nations survey of shite traffic. "Our judges spent 3 weeks assessing your road network," we were told by UN Secretary General António...

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Ryanair begin charging customers to look out the window

In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out...