With it looking increasingly likely that his country's entire team may be banned from competing at the Rio Olympics due to systematic misuse of banned substances, Russian President Vladimir Putin has announced that Moscow will host its own event -...
Following their double exit from Euro 2016, it has just emerged that dozens of stranded Republic and Northern Ireland fans, most of whom ran out of money weeks ago, have setup a new colony in the south of France. "I haven't a...
Nigel Farage's decision to quit as leader of UKIP is a ploy to allow him to take over as manager of the English national football team, the Ulster Fry can reveal. Sources close to the rubber faced celebrity bigot say that...
The UN has stepped in to avert 'a potential humanitarian crisis', by bringing much needed supplies to fans of Northern Ireland and the Republic stranded in France. Now two weeks in, it is understood that many fans are running low...
Sofas are said to be in a "high state of readiness" as their owners prepare for the Euro 2016 group matches involving Northern Ireland and the Republic. "Normally, for tournaments like this, we expect to see an increase in the...
With Euro 2016 just days away, the IFA have dealt Northern Ireland fans a huge blow by announcing they mistakenly requested a consignment of wrinkle-free formal shirts instead of the team's official football jersey. "Due to a communication mixup when ordering we've received a container of 'Non Iron' shirts...
Despite attending the gym regularly and being in what one fitness expert called 'good nick', 28 year old Latspread McCafferty has shocked the fitness world today by announcing that he will not be competing in a bodybuilding competition this summer. The bizarre decision has sparked panic...
An ongoing conflagration involving football international Will Grigg has been safely dealt with, according to a statement released earlier today by the Northern Ireland Fire Service. The Wigan Athletic player is believed to have been set alight at some point in April,...
Controversial manager Jose Mourinho has inadvertently found himself manager of North West side Limavady United, after what has been described as 'a simple mix up over plane tickets.' It is understood that the former Chelsea chief was expected to agree...
Outgoing Tory minister Iain Duncan Smith is being lined up to replace Louis van Gaal at Manchester United, The Ulster Fry can exclusively reveal. Smith sensationally stepped down from his role as manager of the Department of Work and Pensions...

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Ryanair begin charging customers to look out the window

In the aftermath of today's Ryanair theft scandal, in which hackers stole $5 million from the company, the famously frugal airline have announced their latest money-spinning innovation - which charges passengers to look out...