Sport

An ongoing conflagration involving football international Will Grigg has been safely dealt with, according to a statement released earlier today by the Northern Ireland Fire Service. The Wigan Athletic player is believed to have been set alight at some point in April,...

Following the disappointment of Paddy Barnes getting his pan knocked in today, Northern Ireland's gold medal hopes received a well needed boost with the announcement that Marching will become an official sport at the 2020 games in Tokyo. "The IOC were really impressed by our presentation"...

Energy drinks manufacturer Lucozade has been blamed for the disappointing displays of all four 'Home Nations' in the Rugby World Cup. The company's much advertised decision to label their Sport range "for Home Nations only" appears to have backfired dramatically, as first...

Sofas are said to be in a "high state of readiness" as their owners prepare for the Euro 2016 group matches involving Northern Ireland and the Republic. "Normally, for tournaments like this, we expect to see an increase in the...

After another heart-stopping evening's football at Windsor Park, it has become clear that the Northern Ireland football team are determined to take qualification for Euro 2016 right to the wire. A hard fought draw against Hungary last night leaves them...

Liverpool are on the lookout for a new disappointing manager after finally running out of excuses not to sack Brendan Rodgers. Liverpool owner John W. Henry told the Ulster Fry that that today's hard fought draw against Everton was the...

Patriotic local golf fans got an unexpected new hero at this week's Irish Open, after historians discovered that US golfer Graeme McDowell's ancestors are actually from the County Antrim town of Portrush. "Well gee-whiz that's fantastic!" McDowell told local press. "My grandpappy used to tell us...

Animal welfare charities are fearful that small children everywhere will be demanding dancing horses this Christmas, following Great Britain's Gold Medal in yesterday's dressage. Charlotte Dujardin, which is French for something to do with gardens, scooped top spot whilst sitting...

Bookmakers celebrated yesterday as 19 times champion jump jockey, and general all round legend, Tony McCoy stunned the world of sport by announcing that he intended to retire from horse racing at the end of this season. Speaking from on top...

Following his defeat at the hands of Nate Diaz, executives at lads website JOE had an emergency meeting this morning to discuss the possibility of writing an article that isn't about the bearded Irish UFC fighter, Conor McGregor. "How about we do...